The best free bdsm sites

Is it difficult or pleasure for a Master in a BDSM relationship?

Say for example: A man and women love each other very much, get married then 4 years later decide to become a Master/slave BDSM relationship. I know it’s pretty much protocol for the Master to give the slave to other people to play with. Is that difficult for the Master, does he receive pleasure from it, is it just another way to make sure the slave knows where they stand? Combination or mixture of all? I am curious as to how the Master really feels about this. Sorry... it can be two women or men as well. Any Master/slave relationship. I know some couples dont do this but most everything I read says it is very common. I don't want to do this.. I am just curious as to why they do it and what they gain from it. It would really hurt me to see someone I love with another person.

Public Comments

1. It is not protocol for a Master to give slave to others. Some do, sure, but not all. I never did. For those that do, no it is not difficult. They do it because they derive some pleasure or satisfaction from it. Or they might do it as punishment. Edit: I would say it falls in to the "different strokes for different folks" category. Some people really get off on seeing their partners with other people.
2. Uh, if the master DIDN'T enjoy it, I doubt he would be doing it at all...
3. There's no right answer to this question. There are loads of different couples into BDSM and they all differ in their rules with each other. It's just what you feel comfortable with. Would you get pleasure by giving your partner to someone else or would it devastate you to see them enjoying sex with someone else. Swinging is a very sensitive subject. If you have any doubts don't do it as it can ruin relationships. So please think it through carefully. If you're all for it and your partners all for it I see no harm though!
4. Yes, it's a combination of those. First of all, it's not always necessary to give the slave to other people. I call the difference "public" or "private"; I don't know if others use a specific term for it. My "public" slaves were for anyone's use, while my "private" slaves were only for my own personal use. (Edit: Well, I definitely shouldn't say "anyone's" use; rather, my public slaves were for use by anyone I DECIDED to allow to use them. Allowing literally "anyone" to use them would be unsafe and highly irresponsible of me.) Therefore, there was no difficulty for me, because I decided which ones were public or private. Allowing a private slave to be publicly used WOULD have been difficult for me, which is why I decided to keep them private. When I gave my public slaves to others, it was not difficult at all; I did get pleasure from others using them, and it does reinforce the fact to the slave that they are property to be bartered or otherwise used as I see fit. Edit: If you don't want to do this, that is fine. Any activity that is engaged in must be agreed to by both parties in advance. This is known as "informed consent." You have the right to be informed as to what to expect, and you must voluntarily give consent to it beforehand. This is what prevents abuse. You also have the right to specify activities that you WON'T participate in. These are called "limits," and when someone takes you too far beyond your limits, that is when it becomes "abuse." Typically, most people want to extend or expand their limits at some point, but that should be done slowly and properly, when they are ready for it and able to handle it.
5. It's the same as having an open relationship. I guess the answer depends on how secure the people in the relationship are. And to be honest, there's no one-size-fits-all BDSM. Some dominants don't do this at all. I don't know anyone (top or bottom) that swaps out when it's uncomfortable for either one of them. Without respect for feelings and emotions, it's not BDSM, it's abuse. That being said, if there's a "loan", there's usually limits on what's allowed to happen or how far things will go. The tops discuss the terms, but it's not a formal thing. Just casual conversation. If the top is not comfortable, it usually doesn't happen. Sometimes you swap out to give the bottom something the top isn't comfortable doing or not very experienced at (for example, knifeplay or singletails). If that's the case, it's usually very pleasurable for all parties involved and it can be a learning experience for the top. If you're the one in the relationship and are wondering about your master loaning you out, the person you should be talking to is him. Ask him if he's done it before, how it feels, what he gets from it or what he hopes will happen. If you're asking because you're considering loaning out your bottom, go over possible scenarios and try to imagine how you'd feel if.. (things like would you be jealous if the bottom seemed to prefer the other dominant or what if the bottom didn't want to do it and was only trying to please you). In the long run, only you can decide if this is right for you.
6. Well, I'm into the Master/Slave thing and I don't find giveing my slave (I don't have one yet) to other people to play with pleasureful. If someone is going to give wonderful pleasure to my Slave its going to be me and me alone.